Seven Ways to Create and Maintain Loving Connection in your Relationship.

Seven Ways to Create and Maintain Loving Connection in your Relationship.

Keeping the connection you felt when you both first met can take some very simple tips listed below. Some of these can even only take as little as a few seconds. These tips are tried, tested and researched to be effective. They work with the parts of the brain that stimulate the connection of bonding and love through the creation of oxytocin. Yes there is science behind it so try to do a few of these daily. Ready, set, go. 

Read More

Being curious sends your partner all the right messages!

Do you remember those early weeks and months as your relationship started to take shape when you genuinely wanted to know your partners desires, their likes and dislikes and their take on life? It’s that wonderful phase where you are enamored with each other and nothing gets in the way as you stare into each other’s eyes, ask questions and just listen to each other in a blissful, effortless experience of being with your partner. 

This phase of the relationship is such an important one because this level of inquiry sends a clear message to your partner that you are deeply interested in them and it fosters your connection, building solid bonds which create the foundations for a healthy relationship. It’s like putting the work into building a great relationship without even trying. 

As a couple moves into a committed relationship and things feel more secure we can sometimes assume that our partners have learnt all they need to know. We can assume that, after a while, they “know” us. We may even assume that they “know” our likes and dislikes because you have been together for a while. 

The risk is that assumptions like these can cause stagnation in a relationship and put the fires of being interested and passionate about each other out. Sometimes the comfort of just “knowing” each other is not enough to stay engaged and connected. 

The simple task of checking things out with your partner or asking them if their thoughts, desires or views on life have changed can help keep your relationship alive. 

It is as simple as asking your partner questions like “Is the way we spent our last holiday, the same way you want to spend our next holiday?” or “You once said you don’t like flowers but prefer chocolates, is this still the same for you?”

How and what you ask about is important – its about genuine interest coming from a place of empathy and love. 

These questions can really make a big difference to a relationship because they validate our partners and they send a clear message that we want to connect, we see our partner as an individual and we care about their thoughts and feelings.

So ask questions to promote a good sense of the relationship being healthy and show your level of connection.

By Melissa Ferrari 

For more tips and information about love, relationships and happiness visit my Facebook page Love, Life, Relationships & Transformation

 

A thought on marriage by Melissa Ferrari.

"Marriages are stronger when both people can learn how to soothe each other when distressed or unhappy. It's up to you to know your partner that well. Keep trying new ways to see what works. The map on marriage between the two of you is not fixed and always the same, you need to keep re-creating it to see what works!"

Melissa Ferrari

For more tips and information about love, relationships and happiness visit my Facebook page Love, Life, Relationships & Transformation

Eight things that could harm your marriage and how to fix them.

Eight things that could harm your marriage and how to fix them.

As a professional psychotherapist I’ve had the pleasure of working intimately with couples from all walks of life for over 15 years. I’ve seen great acts of kindness in couples and I’ve witnessed some terrible lows. Through the years I’ve seen many patterns and themes emerge that repeat across the many kinds of marriages that exist in today’s modern world. 

From my observation and experience I have created my own list of marriage killers and what needs to be done to stop these playing out in relationships. The good news is that doing the right thing to enhance your attachment is simple and consistency pays off. Avoiding these relationship killers can help transform your relationship!

 

Read More

connection

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” 

― Brené Brown

 

For more tips and information about love, relationships and happiness visit my facebook page Love, Life, Relationships & Transformation