Seven Ways to Create and Maintain Loving Connection in your Relationship.

Keeping the connection you felt when you both first met can take some very simple tips listed below. Some of these can even only take as little as a few seconds. These tips are tried, tested and researched to be effective. They work with the parts of the brain that stimulate the connection of bonding and love through the creation of oxytocin. Yes there is science behind it so try to do a few of these daily. Ready, set, go. 

1. Gaze or stare into each other’s eyes often

You know that look between mother and baby that just spells LOVE? Well you can recreate both the effect and feeling by gazing lovingly into your partner’s eyes. Make an effort to stop and to do it every day even if it is just for 15 seconds. It will have an impact.

2. Touch is about connection

Touch each other often, even if it's just a touch of reassurance.  Reconnect through simple touching actions if you haven’t done so for some time. Hand-holding or a longer than usual hug is a great place to start. Touch is extremely powerful because it is the non-verbal cue that says "you mean something to me".

3. Make sure you laugh

Make sure you laugh even if your partners jokes aren't hilariously funny sometimes! A laugh or even a smile lets your partner know you care and will brighten their day.

4. Be thoughtful about your facial expressions

Are you aware of your facial expressions and what messages they may be conveying? Be curious and become aware. Around 80% of communication is non-verbal and sometimes it does not match what we’re thinking. Be aware of how your facial expressions come across to your partner – when they talk look at them positively, look at them like you care.

5. Change mood ‘gears’ before coming home

Make an effort to greet your partner lovingly. Shift gears out of a bad mood before you come home from your day.

6. Say the most powerful words

Say “I love you” or “I appreciate you”. The ears love to hear positive affirming words. These words help connect you to each other.

7. Have great sex

Have sex often but not just for the sake of having sex but also for the process of bonding. Sex bonds us to our partner because sex is more than a body connection. Importantly, it is also a brain connection.


By Melissa Ferrari

Psychotherapist & Relationship Specialist    

For more tips and information about love, relationships and happiness visit my Facebook page Love, Life, Relationships & Transformation