The New Year is a great time to reflect on what changes you’d like to make in your life, which is why resolutions and goals such as losing weight, giving up smoking and saving money are fairly common. But don’t forget about your love life! January is also a good time to think about your relationship health as well.
The relationships we have with our loved ones have a huge impact on our wellbeing and our sense of happiness, yet often we just push on with the same old problems and issues without taking the time to work out how we can actually improve them.
So take the opportunity now to refresh your relationship for an exciting and positive start to the year with these simple tips:
1. Date night – The festive season can cause a lot of tension between couples so set a date night in January to give your relationship the chance to regroup. Coming back together after being surrounded by family and friends and social activities is a great way to reaffirm your partnership and stay in the ‘couple bubble’ ready to tackle the New Year together as a team.
2. Talk it out – This is the time to discuss openly any ongoing issues you may be facing as a couple. From money, to kids, to holiday planning, every couple has their own jigsaw puzzle of life to make sense of and put together; so make time to talk it all through. If you have deeper emotional struggles then the New Year is a great time to undertake professional counselling to help navigate your way through the difficulties and resolve them. Therapy can be incredibly effective and many couples who come to see me, for example, say they wished they’d come sooner.
3. Play time – Bills, work, mortgages, cleaning, kids – sometimes it seems we’re on a merry-go-round of endless tasks. Often we find ourselves collapsing into bed exhausted at night without having had the chance to consider our own needs, never mind our partners. So this New Year schedule in some fun too! Whether it’s cycling, sailing, walking or dancing, whatever takes your fancy, choose to do something together.
4. Job list – One of the reoccurring arguments I often see in my work as a couple counsellor is about household chores. It may sound trivial, but years of damaging resentment can build up in a relationship if you are the only one to have ever cleaned the bathroom or vacuumed the floor. So address the chores this January and put steps in place to change the arrangement if necessary. Even small changes can make such a huge difference to a couple’s everyday life and help prevent a range
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For more tips, daily quotes and information about love, dating, relationships and happiness visit my Facebook page Melissa Ferrari - Psychotherapist & Relationship Expert. Also available is information about couple therapy and how it can help your relationships.